Tuesday, June 23, 2009

The teenage mystery of kissing

Tonight I'm watching "Freaks & Geeks" and the episode shows the 14-year-old Sam (categorized in the show's parlance as a geek) confronted with his first make-out party.

He is inexperienced in the mysteries of kissing and is also trying to get used to the notion (only in TV) that one of the cute, Freshman cheerleaders likes him and wants the two of them to date. The episode generally focuses on kissing and being kissed and Spin the Bottle.

I know Sam's fear, as I was worried greatly about kissing when I was a high schooler. (I'll admit up front that I had no experience at this in school, and never, NEVER did I play Spin the Bottle. The sheer terror of it would have destroyed me and I never had the opportunity anyway.)

ANYWAY . . .

The episode did a good job of capturing the essential awkwardness of the first kiss and the worries about the kissing and the massive unknown of it all. The scenes where kissing takes place are hesitant, halting, and filled with uncomfortable silences, shifting glances, and false starts.

I don't know how girls think about this sort of thing . . . (I always assumed that they weren't very freaked out about it--probably a stupid thought, but that is how I thought during my geeky high school years.) . . . but I never thought that they understood how terrifying the idea of a kiss was. It was a part of the whole relationship tangle that made high school so difficult. So much of high school seemed to be about hiding who you truly were in order to fit in with the people you wanted to be with, and so the notion of exposing yourself in such an intimate way, both in the idea of forming a relationship with someone and then being intimate (kissing, I mean) with them was a spin in a different direction.

But it is also difficult to explain these feelings to someone in high school. (Honestly, its amazing that relationship happen at all in high school, so ill-equipped are they to handle these things. Perhaps only the shallow people are successful?) So, they thrash about with relationships that they might not truly understand because they don't know how to talk about what they want or how to go about it.

But maybe that was just me.

1 comment:

dtm1971 said...
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