Friday, March 03, 2006

Beating a Dead Horse

Sorry for bringing this up again and again, but I was struck by an oddity.

This quick note is to inform you that while I'm working on a spreadsheet and listening to a Lileks Diner Podcast, I am stunned to note that he is going on about eye-contact etiquette in men's restrooms.

Aren't you excited by this?

Is he reading me?

(Nah . . . it's a universal topic, don'tcha' know.)

But I can dream!

On a completely unrelated tack--
When should a guy replace a pair of shoes?
When the sole is flapping with each step; when the sole is beginning to separate from the upper; when the sole is beginning to thin but hasn't quite gone all the way through; or when they are simply looking tired and old and in need of replacement?
I ask because, naturally, one of my pairs of shoes is a combination of the last two choices. They are old (about two years old, but I don't have lots of shoes, so they've had plenty of use). But, the soles are still attached and no holes have developed.
Two digressions about shoes:
1. My brother Muleskinner once sewed his soles back on a particularly old and, I suppose, memorable pair of shoes. But Muleskinner has always had a bit of frontiersman about him.
2. I once heard/read (?) that Alan Alda wore the same pair of combat boots throughout all eleven years of M*A*S*H's television run. The story goes that he got the shoes from a soldier that served in Vietnam and always wanted to use them, holes and mud and stink and all, to give himself a connection to the hardships of the solder. I don't know if it's true, but it ought to be true.
So . . . when should I replace these shoes? I've been waiting for a good reason for several months now. But, until structural damage occurs, I haven't been able to justify the expense. Is it putting out a hoboish vibe around the department? Are people viewing me differently, judging me by my shoddy footwear? Am I the only one that actually pays attention to shoes? Do I have a foot fetish?
(Nope . . . not answering that one.)


Jack Thunder said...

you just can't get away from bathroom issues.
i am reading a short story by D.F.Wallace that almost revolves around bathroom issues.
(do you want to borrow "Oblivion," by the way? it is Excellent and better (to me) than "Brief Interviews...".)

re shoes:
first of all, the office needs as much hoboish vibe as possible. pity the day when YOU are the vibe's main avatar.

i say never throw out shoes until they pose a danger to yourself. besides, new-looking shoes are the costume of the Establishment.

Sven Golly said...

I'm with Jack on this one. My campaign slogan/personal mantra is 'Hang Onto Your Shoes!' Like a velvetten rabbit for each foot, they get more real every time you wear them. Repair them when holes or other signs of wear and tear pose a danger to life and limb, and keep that strange man Dr. Shoe on State Street in business.